In his 2018 sermon on marriage, Deacon Dr. Bob McDonald explained the beauty of marriage commitment and its sacredness by narrating a true story from the early life of his friend Ed, who is now a priest.
When this incident took place, Fr. Ed was 12 years old. He was standing at the foot of the stairs in his house. His father was busy doing something upstairs and his mom was in the kitchen. Mom shouted out, “Ed, come and take out the garbage.” Ed, thinking he could flex the muscles of his make-believe manhood, shouted back, “No! Take it out yourself.” Ed’s father heard it and in no time was standing right in front of young Ed. He grabbed Ed by the shirt and said, “Never talk to your mother like that again.” Then he thought for a second and added, “Never mind that, no one talks to my wife like that.” Ed quickly learned that there was a special bond between mom and dad and that while he might be the product of that love, he could never disrupt that life-long commitment of husband and wife.
To emphasize this sacred commitment between a man and a woman, Jesus said “they are no longer two, but one flesh” (Mk 10: 8). This thought is largely influenced by the second creation story in Genesis chapter two. Jesus, brushing aside all popular cultures and traditions, goes back directly to the original intention of God. Jesus always wanted to fulfill the purity of God’s plans and taught us how to do it.
When God presents Eve to Adam, Adam exclaims with excitement, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” (Gn. 2:23). This Jewish expression has many connotations. It means husband and wife are of the same nature and therefore, man and woman are equal in dignity and in all respects. Any form of disrespect and abuse to either of them is a disrespect and abuse to God, their creator.
‘One Flesh’ is a lifelong process in marriage. It means husband and wife become one person so that gradually, as the days pass, they will become one mind and one heart. Canon law, while defining marriage as a covenant, tells us that it is a “partnership of the whole of life and which is ordered by its nature to the good of the spouses…” (canon 1055 §1). Without the mutual wellbeing of the spouses, a marriage covenant is empty and will not become ‘One Flesh’.
To become ‘One Flesh’ is an invitation to share in the sacredness of the Triune God. In marriage, a man and a woman help each other to walk always in communion with God and reach Heaven.
-Fr. Ranjan D’Sa OCD